I'm Crying.

Bentley carrying my glove every winter walk we take. (I think it is so I can have one hand free to feed him Frolics with)

Woke up this morning just feeling so sad, Betsy is packing, she is leaving on Thursday. Everyone leaves this week to go home. I can't believe its Christmas already. I have not bought one Christmas gift. No decorations. Not lit any Advent candles, Seen Lucia or put up any decorations.
The stupid sun is shining.
And I just feel lonely today. And I hate change, so just the fact that my room mate is packing up and leaving makes me worried unstable and sad. And the worrying about my own flight, Weird isn't it? At least I know it's the change now.. it's easier to deal with when you know the source I think. I used to just be so sad before traveling not knowing why..

But this time it is also Christmas.
And as much as I am looking forward to go to Australia to see the family, I would much rather have everyone just being in Sweden. I wanna celebrate Christmas at Marsta with my aunts and Uncles and Grandma and the cousins, And the dogs, I miss the dogs, I just wanna sit on the kitchen floor and drink coffee, or sleep in front of the TV in my parents house. And to see all my friends. The God Children, And I want Snow!

I miss the puppies, And hopefully we will have new one's soon..

I even miss this, Skoja and Grisen after a walk, We are all pro overalls on dogs these days..

And then there is Farfar, first Christmas without him.. It's hard. Maybe it is good that we are not doing it the old fashion way this year, I don't know. But next year for sure.